No bundle of joy

This week several Australian tennis players were 'bundled out' of tennis tournaments.

That sentence is a curiosity and periodically words to those effect generate a bemused discussion in this country. I am traversing old ground by entering the conversation, but here goes.

'Bundled out'. A strange expression which is used over and over by sports commentators but only, it seems, under certain conditions.

First, we only ever seem to hear it used in relation to tennis. No one ever said that Ian Thorpe was 'bundled out' of a swimming event nor that Jason Day was 'bundled out' of a golf tournament.

Second, it seems you can only be 'bundled out' in the early rounds, say rounds 1 to 3, of a tennis tournament. No one ever said Lleyton Hewitt was 'bundled out' of the semi finals nor that Pat Rafter was 'bundled out' of the final. No, if you are going to be 'bundled out' it must be early in the tournament.

Third, to be 'bundled out' you generally have to be Australian. Neither Roger Federer nor Novak Djokovic, nor any other non-Australian ever seems to be 'bundled out'. They just lose or at worst are knocked out. As though they were boxers?

Fourth, you must always be 'bundled out'. Surely if you can be 'bundled out' then you should be able to be 'bundled in'. Yet no one ever said that Thanasi Kokkinakis or Nick Kyrgios were 'bundled into' the second round at Wimbledon.

So, if you can't be 'bundled in' then why do we say someone was 'bundled out'. Why not just say they were 'bundled'? The media could report that I was 'bundled' from the first round at Wimbledon. (I'm sure that I would be!)

It is all a bundle of 'tosh' really so I'll put an end to it with a photograph of non-Australian Rafael Nadal sadly 'bundled out' in the first round of the 2016 Australian Open.

(Source: AP)

Radio times

I was seven when television started in Australia but we didn't get one in our home until I was about ten. In my formative years home entertainment was sitting around a radio receiver every evening listening to serials and musical programs. Our imagination was a powerful tool with mental pictures of what was being portrayed in the serials forming in our minds.

I remember how my illusions of these seemingly life like serials evaporated when we went to a radio studio one day to see a serial being broadcast. I saw the reality of actors standing over a microphone with some bald headed man on the side creating the sound effects for doors closing, rain falling and the like. It was like learning the truth about Santa Claus.

Radio plays a different role in our lives nowadays and it is more difficult to win over listener imagination. Modern television and film and astonishing developments in computerised effects mean we are much more cynical and less easily deceived.

There is an advertisement currently broadcast on morning radio for a health service in Sydney specialising in depression. It is a serious matter. The advertisement depicts an apparently young groom tearfully talking about his young bride's depression. Even allowing for the obvious, the knowledge that this is an advertisement, the groom's tearful disclosure just doesn't ring true to me.

I suppose its all in the ear of the beholder but this is one message my imagination hasn't bought.

Media standards

I'm interrupting our travels to mention the current top news item here in the USA, the shocking attack in an elevator by a footballer upon his then fiancee, now wife.

Every US channel report we saw last night showed the sickening video in its entirety multiple times. This morning the BBC World Service by contrast is illustrating the same news item by selective still shots from the video.

Domestic violence is an abhorrent practice. I wonder which is the better approach to publicly reporting such events? The 'in your face' coverage by the US channels which seems salacious or the BBC's discreet style which may have the effect of understating the seriousness?

I taught ology.......

I know I shouldn't throw stones.....

but......

last night on 'The Book Club' not one but two of the panelists managed similar tautologies.

One, a writer, referred to '6am in the morning'. The other, a teacher of creative writing no less, referred to '1am in the morning'.

On our ABC.

I did but see him diving by.......

My good blogger friend Andrew observed that the male gymnastics and men's diving obviously had not yet commenced at the London Olympics or I would be aware that this sporting extravaganza was underway. As an aside, am I allowed to actually print the words London Olympics or am I in danger of persecution by the IOC police for unauthorised use of their 'intellectual' - commercial(?) - property?

Well, I am aware of that event. Who could not be with the welter of coverage it is receiving in the media?

On my return home from work this afternoon I decided I would take some time to view the coverage. After all, my cable television service has quite thoughtfully added eight - count them, eight - additional sports channels and those eight channels are televising nothing but the Olympic Games non stop, 24 hours per day, for the entirety of the Games.

Now, Andrew may not believe this but what should be on display on the very first channel I tuned to but Men's Synchronised Diving. Truly, I had no idea it was being screened at that moment. In fact I had no idea there was such a sport as Synchronised Diving. Let's set aside whether any activity involving synchronisation can be called a sport as distinct from an entertainment and I have to admit the images were immediately pleasing to my eye.

There they stand, young and fit male divers two by two, adjusting themselves whilst on that high platform with the unblinking television camera bringing it all to me and full frontal no less in my own lounge room. The dives themselves are quite thrilling, dangerous looking and best of all over in seconds when the pairs then pull themselves from the pool with speedos clinging to their...ahem...bodies.

As if this feast for the eyes were not sufficient most of the pairs then adjourn to a wonderfully clear watered spa where they frolic with other pairs of divers. Who dreamt up this 'sport'; George Michael?

I loved it and was hooked right through to the final medal deciding round. The Chinese pair won it. Apparently the Chinese have won everything. The audience poolside was disappointed that the British pair failed to secure a medal. One of the British divers was the popular Tom Daley. Curiously Daley seemed alone in shunning the communal spa following each dive choosing instead to shower in full gaze of the television camera. I didn't mind at all.

Tom Daley is rather attractive actually and here he is during one of his numerous showers.

(www.london2012.com)

And here he is with his synchronised partner, the rather aptly named, Peter Waterfield.

(www.london2012.com)

Now that event has been decided, I wonder which channel is screening the male gymnasts?

Till choice do us part

'Celebrities' Katy Perry and Russell Brand are to divorce

The latest example in the growing portfolio of evidence of the natural superiority of heterosexual marriage over same sex unions.

During his marriage Mr Brand informed an interviewer....

"I can’t believe I used to have sex 20 times a week, especially now I’m married. But now I’m a bloody good gardener," Russ joked.

Sounds gay to me.

Minister 'effs' himself

Australia's Communications Minister, Stephen Conroy, dropped the coyly described 'F bomb' live on television during a lunchtime address he gave this week to the National Press Club.

Stephen Conroy

Rather apt for a communications Minister, don't you think? Well a few of the Minister's political opponents, some no doubt from his own Party quite apart from those in the Opposition, as well as the usual small legion of  the 'holier than thou' set don't think so and they have got stuck into him for this lapse in good manners.

In the grand scheme of things his careless slip of the tongue is scarcely a hanging offence no matter how much the opponents might bleat. Yes, Minister Conroy should have exercised sufficient discipline not to 'F' in broad daylight on a rarely viewed program but if that proves to be his only mistake in a political career then he will have done rather well.

The  Minister's bigger mistake to my mind was an apparent failure to take the heat out of the issue with an immediate and unequivocal admission of error and apology. All he had to do was say 'I was careless in my language, I didn't intend any offence and I apologise unreservedly to anyone I have offended'. All the wind would be taken from the sails of the whingers.

The former Queensland state Premier Peter Beattie was a master of the speedy admission of guilt plus apology strategy whenever he was caught out over a matter. In fact towards the end of his career these apologies were coming so regularly they were almost the only utterances we were hearing from him in the other states. So well did this strategy work for Beattie that he won a number of re-elections against predictions and was able to retire on his own terms rather than be bundled from office as was predicted would be his fate.

Getting back to Conroy, as recently as this morning the Sydney media has quoted his staff as saying the Minister did nothing wrong. The needless and rather silly fire keeps being stoked.

Most politicians never seem to learn.

The law, privacy, media and federation

Australia is a Federation of six states and several territories. The Commonwealth of Australia, by that I mean all of us, are subject to federal law and then there is the separate law laid down by each of the states and territories which impacts on the residents of those states and territories as well as on the rest of us when we happen to be passing through.

Actually this is dangerous territory (no pun intended) for me as I have no legal training whatsoever so perhaps I should cease this legal comment here and leave the topic for experts like Marcellous.

So why have I raised it? Well I have just spent the weekend in the state of Queensland and whilst there I have viewed news bulletins on the aftermath of a terrible fire in a nursing home in my home state of New South Wales (NSW). A number of residents in that home have lost their life following the fire. A man has been charged in connection with that fire and the news reports in Queensland not only name that man but show uncensored photos and moving images of him and even interviews he conducted with the media before the Police commenced their investigation.

This evening I returned home (NSW) and the news reports here have the accused man's features pixelated. I know, or perhaps I should say I understand, the reason for this is to help ensure any legal proceedings are not contaminated especially should any parties to a trial (witnesses and jury members?) form opinions or in the case of witnesses present recollections that knowingly or subliminally are affected by these public reports.

I'm a NSW resident and so could always be summoned to appear in a jury sometime. I'm not volunteering mind you. So what protects the fairness of the proceedings if I were to called to jury duty in that matter? Perhaps potential jurors are questioned as to their foreknowledge or opinions about the matter in question? Perhaps I would be excused (or is that recused?) because I happened to view television reports in another state. I don't know. But, to restate, I'm not volunteering anyway.

What about cases that arise in the border areas between states? Residents there often have access to the same television networks from both of the adjoining states and would see the same reports uncensored from one side of the border and censored from the other side.

Of course, potentially undermining it all is the internet. Anyone with even moderate computing skills can research issues from many sources whether they be local or (for want of a better term) foreign. Come to think of it I remember now that cases have recently been aborted or jurors excused/recused(?) after it became known they researched the internet for information about an issue in which they had been sitting in judgement.

It's all a bit difficult isn't it?

Naked disaster

We've seen it in Australia too. Extreme weather conditions bear down on the country and the television channels respond with 'Breaking News' complete with crosses to reporters 'risking life and limb' in the conditions to prepare viewers for doom and gloom falling little short of the end of the world. Notwithstanding that the loss and damage might prove significant the actual impact rarely proves as drastic as foreshadowed.

Hurricane Irene was going to do untold damage to the Eastern rim of the United States last week and indeed there was loss of life and very serious damage in places. Still the impact thankfully fell short of some of the dire predictions. Without making light of the impact for those who did suffer, I do find the following television report amusing. The reporter is working hard to convey the gravity of the situation and then is undone when bystanders come out to play. Nudity alert at the 40 second mark.

A tragic loss

(ABC News)

Condolences to the families and colleagues of  Paul Lockyer, John Bean and Gary Ticehurst whose lives have been cruelly taken prematurely in yesterday's helicopter crash.

The ABC News site records it's tribute to the three men.

Don't you agree?

Why do they do it?

I've always assumed that the purpose of a radio or television interview is for the interviewer to elicit information or opinions from the interviewee. To my mind an interview is not intended to be a soap box for the interviewer to express their opinion bulldozing any view, whether that be contrary or in agreement, that the interviewee might possess.

So why do so many interviewers ask long winded questions that in reality are not questions at all but rather statements of their opinion leaving no real opportunity for the interviewee to respond?

'Being a princess isn't all it's cracked up to be'*

(* Diana, Princess of Wales)

The New Yorker 2 May 2011

This magazine cover amuses me. Voyeurism is all the go at the moment with the wedding this Friday of a certain Miss Catherine Elizabeth Middleton to His Royal Highness Prince William Arthur Philip Louis of Wales, Royal Knight Companion of the Most Noble Order of the Garter Master of Arts. The groom is second in the line of succession to the throne of sixteen independent states one of which is...cough, splutter...Australia.

Thank you linesmen, thank you ball boys.

*Remember me to Herald Square

(*'Give My Regards to Broadway' by George M Cohan)

There is an interesting coincidence with the reference to Herald Square contained in the famous old tune celebrating New York's theatre district, Broadway. Herald Square took it's name from the New York Herald (now defunct) which had it's headquarters in the district.

Sydney has a Broadway too which is basically a broad (by Sydney's standards) but not overly long stretch of road which links the inner western suburbs with the southern edge of the city's Central Business District. One of the intersections at Broadway's northern end is Jones Street which for many years contained the headquarters of the Sydney Morning Herald (SMH), Australia's oldest continuously published newspaper.

In the mid 1990s, the SMH moved from it's Jones Street premises which became the home for the Sydney Organising Committee of the (2000) Olympic Games and the comparable organising committee for the 2000 Paralympic Games.

The southern end of Broadway was for many years the home of the Grace Brothers department store which from 1923 filled two grand old buildings on either side of the Bay Street intersection. I suppose there was a time when that branch of the Department store operated successfully but I have no recollection of it being other than a sad, struggling barn of a place devoid of life and more importantly devoid of customers.

The southern of the two buildings along with adjoining property was converted into the Broadway Shopping Centre in 1988 and at the same time the northern building was converted into student accommodation taking advantage of the presence on either side of two universities, Sydney University to the south and the University of Technology to the north. An outposted branch of (the USA's) Notre Dame University is now located to the east. The shopping centre was an immediate and ongoing success probably to the chagrin of what was left of Grace Brothers' old management. The centre is always packed whenever I visit.

I used to attend the cinema complex at the centre regularly but nowadays only visit the centre occasionally; mostly, as I did today, to lunch with Kn who works at Sydney University. One of the side benefits of any visit is the terrific eye candy on view regardless of your gender and sexuality.

I took a quick snap to illustrate this point whilst stopped at the lights as I waited to turn into the car park.

One guess which of these attracted my attention

Observant local readers will notice the electorate office of the Federal Member for Sydney, Tania Plibersek, in the background.

'How does he do it?'

A representative Melbourne male

This anonymous representative Melbourne male marvelled 'how does he do it?' before adding the apparently stunning news that 'a local Melbourne guy is dating one of the most beautiful girls in the world' as though such a situation was as remote a thought as a three years old tot developing the theory of relativity. So who is 'he'? Typical Melbourne guy Andrew? Not likely.

No, this was Sydney's Channel 10 news this evening breathlessly reporting a luncheon date between 'he' who once controlled the most famous mystery balls in cricket and the 'girl' whose dress once lost control of the most famous pair of boobs of their day.

Yes folks, Shane Warne and Liz Hurley have come along as the latest 'breaking news' to entertain the masses.

Shit happens

I don't often feel sorry for Opposition Leader, Tony Abbott, and it surely isn't breaking news that he isn't the most polished of communicators but when he commented in Afghanistan that 'shit happens' he probably wasn't at that moment thinking about it happening to him.

I don't know about elsewhere in Australia but this 'non-news' news item is getting ridiculous coverage in Sydney.

Can we move on to the next 'breaking news' drama please...and quickly.

I wanna stick around a while and get my kicks*

('Jailhouse Rock' by Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller)

This weekend every year - the second in January - the regional town of Parkes holds it's Elvis Presley Festival and every year the media reports on the Elvis Express, a train which conveys participants to the festival from Sydney.

Reporting the event this year I heard James' ABC refer to the various Elvis Presleys travelling as the 'Elv-eye'. I presume this is now the approved term for a number of Elvises.

That's fine by me.

The Elv-eye have left the room.

Oprah-fication

The Sydney Opera House is being 'Oprah-fied' in preparation for the Great One who will be recording two of her television programs in the forecourt here next Tuesday. A glorious day yesterday and more of the same forecast until Monday but alas the forecast for Tuesday includes 'showers'. However that may not prove a problem. As one sycophantic 'news' reporter breathlessly noted about the Presence in Melbourne, poor weather magically cleared when she appeared there just as has happened wherever she has stayed on her Australian sojourn and significantly (the reporter noted) just as happened for the Pope on his visit. So there.

That's it; no more cynicism in this post.

(Click photos to enlarge)

Much of the forecourt and all of the front stairs have been fenced off. A stage is being erected on the left and you might just make out one of the camera/lighting towers mid-photo.

A bit closer now. The edge of the stage to the right with a large television screen being raised into position. You can see several of the camera/lighting towers and the beginnings of temporary 'stadium seating' to augment the forecourt steps which will make for some uncomfortable viewing for those allocated seating there.

Another view of the stage from the front.

Workers climbing all over the place.

Thankfully the northern promenade on the harbourside of the Opera House remains available to the public and was it's usual gorgeous sight in yesterday's glorious weather.

The ever present runners remained undeterred by the construction impediments.

Sydney's water taxis continued a roaring trade at the Man O War Steps wharf on the eastern edge of the Opera House. The Royal Botanic Gardens are in the background and a temporary marquee is visible in the distance, perhaps to cater for Ms Winfrey's visit to the Gardens yesterday or, more likely, in preparation for the forthcoming annual Sydney Festival.

You ought to be in pictures

Yesterday's opening of Westfield Sydney brought the cameras out; both the professional media and the ordinary visitors like myself.

What should we get next? The Deli or the Burger place?

Sound and pictures.

I want to be a sound recordist when I grow up.

On air.

Look! Up in the sky....

Is this woman famous? Cameras followed her everywhere.

Tomorrow: the food court.

Gold...Gold...Oh!?!?

No sooner has the football season ended and we have the Delhi Commonwealth Games underway. Australia generally does well at these Games so we can expect plenty of media overkill when the predicted flood of Aussie gold medals eventuates. Of course we sometimes win events we were not expecting to succeed in and more often fail to win events the commentators assure us are 'certainties'.

One gold medal event we ought win at every Games is 'jingoism'. Our commentators have unfailing confidence, or should that be over confidence, in Aussie superiority.

Well, here we are only hours into the first day and one of the Aussie swimmers, notorious for recent events out of the pool, has failed to qualify beyond the heats of his only event less than an hour after one of the television commentators, herself a former champion swimmer, declared she could not see anyone beating him.

The media's frenzied forensic examination of this calamity has already begun.

Phantom of the Oprah

A certain world famous personality who just happens to be one of the richest women in the world is coming to Australia in December to promote herself  perform in the building pictured, whose name bears an uncanny resemblance to her own, and the Australian taxpayer will be contributing towards the cost.

I'm happy for her fans that some will have the chance to view their idol up close and I accept that the publicity and carefully managed images might help promote economically valuable tourism for Australia but I am in dread of the groveling media coverage that lies ahead.

Madam will no doubt be treated like a divine potentate with much breathless bowing and scraping from a star struck journalistic fraternity.