I Want To Sleep With Tom Stoppard

(Tamarama Rock Surfers)

This new play is by Toby Schmitz. A young aspiring actor brings his older actress girlfriend home for dinner with his parents. The father, a dentist, has a low opinion of acting as a profession and wastes no time at the dinner table expressing that opinion to the feisty girlfriend who can give as good as she gets.

I Want To Sleep With Tom Stoppard is a witty comedy with an edge. Caroline Brazier as the actress and Andrew McFarlane as the father are standouts and they receive strong support from Wendy Strehlow and Tom Stokes.

A nicely staged production from Tamarama Rock Surfers at the small independent Bondi Pavilion Theatre. I predict this play will be taken up by one of the major professional companies.

★★★★

Bridge

Last night, 42.30%, 10/14, we thought we had done better.

Your Sister's Sister

Emily Blunt, concerned for her best friend Mark Duplass who continues to grieve over his brother's death sends him off for a break at her country cottage where he unexpectedly encounters her sister Rosemary DeWitt who herself is experiencing grief over a lost relationship.

That's the beginning of a quirky connection between the three. 'Your Sister's Sister' is a low key comedy/drama about the usual stuff of life; what we fail to tell each other and our yearnings for intimacy.

★★★

He laid me

The carpet layer at work tucking my carpet to conceal the cables for my newly installed pay television service service.

Bernie

A funeral director in Texas who is beloved by the community ingratiates himself with the most unpopular widow in town. Despite her unpopularity, and no matter what he does, Bernie retains the confidence of the town folk.

The film is taken from a true story and is fascinating in the way the actual town folk who appear in it blend in with those who are professional actors to the extent that one group is indistinguishable from the other.

Much of the film contains people speaking directly to the audience. Whilst this technique can easily become boring it works on this occasion because the individuals are such an eccentric and interesting set of people.

Jack Black is terrific as the funeral director. A very funny film.

★★★★

An odd couple?

I've moved four floors up in the building I have lived in for twenty-two years. As buildings go it is not a small one nor is it a large one. There are 36 apartments in total, three per floor, and given that the occupancy turnover rate is low I imagined that I knew most, if not all, of my neighbours; at least by sight.

Yet my neighbours in both apartments on my new floor are as strangers to me. I simply didn't recognise them as people I knew to be living in the building.

The man in the apartment to the east of mine is named Js and is probably of a similar age to me. I'm not good at judging ages and I could be wildly wrong. Nevertheless, I'm pretty sure Js is of 'senior citizen' age. Or thereabouts anyway. He introduced himself to me and it appears Js has a job involving education. Somewhere in the western suburbs. Js wears one of those Marxist/Leninist style peaked caps. I've haven't seen him bare headed to date. I think I have seen Js wearing socks with sandals but maybe I imagined that.

In brief conversations with me Js referred several times to a flatmate named Rd. My gaydar suggested to me that 'flatmate' was a euphemism. I wasn't aware of anyone named Rd living in the building and wasn't sure if I had ever seen the flatmate. That changed on Friday.

The cable television company sent a technician to install, or was it transfer, my cable service to the new apartment. The point is not insignificant, at least to the service provider, who made numerous follow up calls to me on the matter because to them the correct answer affects what they will charge me for the transfer or installation. Don't ask me because their calls left me more confused than ever but the best bit is that they so confused themselves as well that they decided not to charge me anything at all. A rare win for me.

But back to the technician. He was rather officious to begin with and I was soon very short with him. I wasn't keen on what he was proposing and just as I was telling him so with a degree of oral force, Js appeared on the landing. Js was in a hurry and couldn't wait but when I asked if I could show the technician how his cable connection was installed Js readily agreed throwing open his apartment to us whilst simultaneously announcing our entry to the unknown Rd even as he raced back out to catch the lift.

Rd appeared by our side and he was nothing like I would have imagined. It was an odd couple moment.

For one thing Rd would scarcely be older than his mid twenties. There must be thirty to forty years difference in their ages. Then there is the fact that whilst Js is short, stocky, rather plain looking and of an Anglo-Celtic appearance Rd is tall, lean, gorgeous looking and possesses the darkest of dark complexions. Rd is of African or West Indian origin, I would think.

If Rd was curious as to these two strangers standing unsupervised in his apartment then he masked that curiosity supremely. One look at us and Rd disappeared into the recesses of the apartment not to be seen again.

Once the cable guy and I had exhausted our argument in Js' apartment we quietly made our departure. I wasn't sure whether or not to lock their apartment door and as Rd was nowhere to be seen I made the decision to lock it. Presumably Rd had the wherewithal to unlock the door later without the need to wait for Js to return and rescue him. Well, I hope that was the case.

The Splinter

(Sydney Theatre Company)

In 'The Splinter' a couple are reunited with their four years old daughter nine months after she has disappeared from her bedroom. They work hard to regain her trust and affection all the while wondering, fearing, what happened to her.

This short, one act, play features two actors as the couple and two puppeteer performers who manipulate marionettes representing the daughter as well as depicting other images.

It is an unusual, at times eerie, work well performed by the foursome.

★★★

Maple leafers

Three French speaking Canadian backpackers discussing a local mobile phone plan in a Sydney shopping centre.

Bridge

Last night 44.20%, 8/10, some dumb mistakes.

Hope Springs

'Hope Springs' is advertised as a comedy and whilst there are humorous moments in my opinion the movie is more of a drama with its lengthy scenes frankly discussing 'marital relationships' in the various interpretations of that term.

Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones play a married couple who by their 31st anniversary have grown to be strangers to each other cohabiting a residence. Streep yearns for a return of the intimacy and affection of their earlier years together. Jones has turned into a tightwad and a grump with a single interest of golf.

I've read some widely differing views on this movie. I thought it was quite a reasonable depiction of how relationships can deteriorate in the absence of ongoing communication and empathy. The ending is no great surprise.

✮✮✮

And so it goes....

My move has gone surprisingly smoothly with one, predictable, exception.

How lucky was I to have recommended to me a company that not only decluttered, packed and removed my belongings but also arranged items for charity and disposal, unpacked at the new location and cleaned the departing locations in preparation for their new owners. Everything was unpacked neatly in appropriate areas of my new apartment, more neatly than I would have managed and there was a final delivery of a gift of flowers to celebrate the move. The company wasn't perfect as one item was misdirected but given that three apartments were in the mix (my new apartment, my old apartment and my late mother's last apartment) I think the outcome was more than satisfactory.

So what was the exception? My old nemesis, a telco I will no longer name - at least today - so as to starve it of publicity, even unfavourable publicity.

I had applied online to move my phone, internet and cable television service ahead of the move. I received an email acknowledgement containing an application number for my move. A staff member rang a couple of days later to confirm my application and take details. She told me I would be contacted again shortly before the move.

I wasn't.

I rang the telco the day before the move and was told there was no record of my application even with my application number. Then I was told the application had been found but no action had been taken. The dates of my move were incorrectly recorded. It took an hour over the phone to rearrange the details.

I was told the cable television change would take place on Monday despite my protestations that more planning was required. Even then the technician arrived four hours and one full day earlier than the notified appointment and as I feared could not proceed without the planning being completed.

I rang to make a fresh appointment and was told there were unexplained problems with my previous bookings. This resulted in another 45 minutes long telephone call whilst the latest call centre staff member sorted it out.

I have a new appointment for Friday.

Truly, I have no luck whatsoever in my dealings with the telco.

A room with a view

The move to my new apartment has commenced. I tried to post a (jerky) video taken with my iPhone displaying the view but for some reason Blogger is not downloading it so you'll have to make do with this limited view photograph from the lounge room.

Bridge

Last night, 56.50%, 3/9, pleasing.

South Pacific

Opera Australia is presenting The Lincoln Center Theater (USA spelling) production of Rodgers and Hammerstein's South Pacific.

One of the great Broadway musicals, South Pacific is adapted from James A Michener's 'Tales of the South Pacific' and was first staged in 1949 just four years after the end of World War 2, the events of which provide the background to the musical.

It surprises me that the Lincoln Center production in 2008 was the first ever revival of the musical on Broadway. It is an outstanding musical and its subject matter which covers race and intolerance was both relevant and controversial in the 1940s. I've read that one reason the musical had not been revived earlier was that those themes were no longer seen as 'fashionable' but it seems to me they are as relevant as ever.

In South Pacific, Rodgers and Hammerstein took several separate tales and interwove them into one storyline.

Unlike 21st Century musicals, South Pacific does not rely on high tech staging nor does it survive on just one dubious hit tune repeated ad nauseum. The musical has half a dozen or more wonderful, memorable songs and the staging is deceptively simple. It is terrific how effective the scene changes and settings are achieved with little more than adjustments to wooden slatted blinds.

The staging is full of colour and light.

The Lincoln Center Director, Bartlett Sher, is responsible for this production. The cast as best I can tell is almost entirely local and they are terrific. The Australian Opera and Ballet Orchestra provides outstanding support.

Every cast member is 'miked' and whilst the amplification ensures every word is clearly heard it is the source of my only criticism of this production. The New Zealand baritone, Teddy Tahu Rhodes, has a powerful, penetrative voice which with amplification hit me over and over like a sonic boom.

Lisa McClune, Eddie Perfect and Kate Ceberano are all excellent but it is unfair to focus on the star names as everyone contributes star quality performances.

A wonderful production.

✮✮✮✮✮

The Beatles Unplugged

We went to see/hear The Beatles Unplugged because a friend of my theatre companion is a member of the Sydney Philharmonia Chamber Singers and Band. We were told to look out for the friend who would be wearing a Sgt Pepper outfit and located to the right of the featured singers, Rob Mills and Bobby Fox who starred in Jersey Boys in Australia.

The concert begins with Sitar music and the choir assembling on stage. This is no concert with static choir holding song books, however. The choir was mobile throughout the concert engaging in quite nicely organised choreography. Identifying the friend was tricky though because all thirty-three members of the choir were dressed entirely in black. Not a Sgt Pepper in sight.

The first half of the concert comprised nine Beatles tunes mostly sung low key, delicately. It wasn't a style I was familiar with for Beatles tunes and whilst the singing was undoubtedly of good quality it didn't greatly appeal to me at least not until the last two songs, 'She's Leaving Home' and 'Hello Goodbye' both of which were sung closer to the originals. The other drawback of the first half was that Mills and Fox, both 'miked up', were almost inaudible or at least indistinguishable from the choir.

It wasn't until the second half that the amplification of Mills and Fox was sorted out and I could enjoy their contribution.

The second half was a complete contrast. Everyone, including the band members, changed out of their black clothing and into colourful, almost psychedelic, clothing. Now the Sgt Pepper singer was identifiable. The nine post interval Beatles songs were delivered robustly. I enjoyed this half immensely.

The nine member band performed outstandingly throughout.

The audience, which I suspect was 'peppered' with friends and relatives, gave the concert a rapturous ovation at the conclusion.

✮✮✮

A memory

Boxing Day, 26 December 1958. I was nine years old and I recall the day clearly. My father drove into the city in the morning to the Mayfair Theatre. You could do that sort of thing in those days and actually have somewhere to park and the parking was free. A new film was starting that day for the summer holidays and Dad purchased five tickets. He was taking my mother and me and my grandparents to the movies that afternoon. The 2pm session.

The Mayfair in the 1960s when it screened 'Cleopatra'

The Mayfair has long disappeared but my memory remains.

Having purchased the tickets my father returned us home. We had lunch, picked up my grandparents, drove back into town and we went to the movies.

I remember we sat about two thirds the way down the stalls on the right hand side. The auditorium was packed. The expectation was intense. The film was to be screened in a new format; 70mm. When the lights dimmed the curtain parted to reveal a huge, curved screen, bigger than any we had ever seen before.

There were no pre-movie advertisements nor trailers as we were used to seeing. Instead 'an introduction' to 70mm was screened. The audience ooohed and aaahhed as though we were really doing the stomach churning turns and twists as the camera took the audience on a ride through various locations in the USA. After a couple of minutes we were in a vehicle hurtling down a steep street scene in San Francisco. Suddenly another vehicle appeared on a cross street and we raced headlong into it.

At the very moment of impact, with wondrous and exquisite timing, the opening credits of the main feature appeared. The movie we were all agog to see had commenced. It was 'South Pacific'.

At intermission my father, grandfather and I took a walk around the block. My father asked his father-in-law what he thought of the movie. My grandfather's response was one word, 'outstanding', spoken with a vehemence and a certain inflection that I have never forgotten.

They were different times. It was only thirteen years since the end of World War 2 and all the adults had experienced the war years. The war time setting of the movie's plot was something they all could relate with easily.

The movie, an adaptation of one of Broadway's greatest musicals, was a stunning success. That premiere season we attended was to run for more than five years. Astonishing then and unthinkable for a movie nowadays.

I periodically recall the day and the reason for it coming into my mind this time is that the musical is being staged in Sydney at the moment in a new production as part of Opera Australia's season.

I have attended it this past weekend.

Dream on

The fact that I was sitting down eating a hamburger as I photographed this young man says much for why I don't have a physique like his. That's the lean and fit look I wish I possessed.

There's Aida and there's Aida

A few weeks back I wrote about attending Opera Australia's Aida. Only a week later the SBS network, coincidentally or malevolently, screened a performance of Aida from La Scala in Milan. The performance dated from around 2008 and was in the presence of Germany's Chancellor Angela Merkel.

I watched that screening out of interest as a comparison with the performance I had attended in Sydney. I only intended to watch for a short time not expecting that I could stomach a full repeat so soon but ended up watching it in full.

The comparisons with OA's production were not flattering to us. La Scala clearly has the advantage over Sydney's Opera House in terms of stage space. Its epic production was both crowded and spacious at the same time whereas the Sydney staging was simply crowded with limited free movement possible.

It must be wonderful for the artists to have so much space to work with at La Scala yet at the same time it must give them headaches designing a staging that isn't lost in all that spaciousness.

The La Scala set was stunning. It was massive but it was so, so stylish. Ours looked like Ziegfeld Follies tizziness by comparison.

This afternoon I am attending OA's staging of South Pacific. I suspect that La Scala has never staged a Broadway musical and may never feel the need to do so.

Martin Place, Recital Hall

Early evening in Martin Place. I was walking to the Recital Hall for a concert entitled 'The Beatles Unplugged'. More about that in a later post.

The Recital Hall at interval. Most of the audience had adjourned to the various bars.

The reverse view, from my seat.

Zoo Breakfast

Breakfast @ The Zoo Cafe

Face to Face

(Sydney Theatre Company)

'Face to Face' is a stage play adapted from a film of the same title by Ingmar Bergman.

A female Psychiatrist suffers a sudden and speedy deterioration following a sexual assault. Various people re-enter her life mostly in her subconscious as she is confined to a hospital.

Quite simple staging leaves the focus to the performances which are strong across an ensemble of nine. Kerry Fox is powerful in the role of the Psychiatrist.

☆☆☆

The Sapphires

Adapted from a play I saw a few years back at Belvoir Street Theatre, 'The Sapphires' is inspired by the true story of four young and naive Aboriginal women who formed a soul singing group and entertained US troops in Vietnam in 1968. Given the topic and the times - only a year earlier white Australians had voted 'yes' in a referendum, that changed the wording of the Australian Constitution and effectively counted Aborigines as part of the population for the first time - the subject matter is rich in the history of disadvantage affecting indigenous Australians. Additionally the Vietnam war polarised Australians and to this day is a source of bitter memories for many.

Like the play, the film focusses on the upbeat aspects of the women's experiences. The discrimination they suffered is not ignored - it is represented in some powerful moments - but the film remains primarily in the feel good category.

The four actors, Deborah Mailman, Jessica Mauboy, Shari Sebbens and Miranda Tapsell are all excellent. They receive strong support from Irish actor Chris O'Dowd as their inebriated manager and from a host of terrific performers in the 'minor' roles; 'minor' in terms of screen time not in terms of importance.

I was moved to see images of the four actual women of the story displayed with the end credits.

A delightful film.

☆☆☆☆

Skywriting over Sydney

A skywriter - or maybe more than one - was kept busy writing messages in a gorgeous blue sky over Sydney yesterday.

This was a message being written at around 11.15am;

I don't know what the final wording was.

Later, around 2.30pm this message was being written;

The eventual message read 'Rhonda for PM'. I don't know of any politician named Rhonda, let alone one who aspires to be Prime Minister. Maybe the message had some other meaning?

Beauty

(South Africa; in Afrikaans and English)

Francois (Deon Lotz) is probably racist and homophobic but he is living a duplicitous life secretly meeting men of similar ilk at a remote farmhouse to engage in sex. Not that they think of themselves as being gay or bisexual. They deride the 'faggots'. A married man with two adult daughters, Francois becomes infatuated with his nephew Christian (Charlie Keegan) when the university law student attends his daughter's wedding and he begins to stalk the younger man across the country.

'Beauty' (original title 'Skoonheid') is a discomforting film with several scenes of homosexual activity including a sexual assault. The film is particularly slow moving with many long static scenes often without dialogue.

The performances are uniformly strong and natural.

Rated R (18+) in Australia.

☆☆☆

Must treat life more seriously...

Another tid bit from my old school reports. This one from May 1960. I was ten years old.

The class teacher remarks that I 'Must treat life more seriously and concentrate on the job in hand.'

Pity the young artistic or sensitive soul.

The Bourne Legacy

The end credits mention that 'The Bourne Legacy' is based on the Bourne series (of books) by Robert Ludlum. It is the fourth film based on those books. The previous three films featured Matt Damon in the title role as Jason Bourne, a deep undercover CIA operative on the run from his own organisation.

This time around the Bourne character is present by reference but not physically. The main character is another undercover operative, Aaron Cross, who also finds himself on the run, initially in search of needed medication and later in support of a hunted scientist.

So, whilst the operative has changed the general premise remains the same. Something portentous and ominous is happening in the world of counter intelligence causing a good guy operative to be chased around the world, preferably in the most scenic of locations.

Aaron Cross is played by Jeremy Renner who is a capable actor. Renner matches Damon's Bourne for action but he lacks that indefinable charismatic attraction that made Damon so popular. In the three previous films I would have been disappointed if Bourne had lost out in the long run but in this latest film I watched Aaron Cross' adventures as a neutral observer not disliking the character but not invested in the need to see him survive.

The first half of 'The Bourne Legacy' is full of counter intelligence and scientific mumbo jumbo that sounds very important but is mostly incomprehensible. The second half has the obligatory frenetic chase in an exotic location. This time the location is Manila in the Philippines. The chase, mostly on motor cycles, is suitably dexterous and dangerous. It also is absurd.

The film is aimed at action lovers and on that level it is slick and satisfactory.

☆☆☆

Bridge

Last night: 49.50%, 9/13, better than we thought.

'A little less exhibitionism...'

Further re-discoveries from the decluttering process...

A school report in December 1960 when I was all of eleven years old contained this concluding remark from the Headmaster;

'A little less exhibitionism and more effort would be worthwhile.'

I started young!

The way we were

The 'decluttering' process has commenced ahead of my move. A lot of dust has been disturbed and long forgotten photographs discovered.

Here am I in 2nd Class in 1956. I was seven.

Just do it

James Connor, Australia, in diving practice
(www.london2012.com)

Just because I like it.

Magic Mike

Channing Tatum makes avant garde furniture and is struggling to establish himself in business. He is raising money to achieve his goals working as a roof tiler by day and in the evenings as a stripper come dancer come spruiker in a male revue. Tatum's nighttime boss nicknames him 'Magic Mike' for his ability to attract the ladies and resolve problems. However the one problem Tatum can't seem to resolve is how to get himself into his preferred career.

A young drifter attaches himself to Tatum and against his initial judgement Tatum draws the drifter into the world of the revue.

'Magic Mike' is reminiscent of 'Boogie Nights' both in its subject matter of young men in the adult entertainment industry and in its photographic style.

Tatum is no great shakes as an actor but has a certain quiet appeal being himself. Matthew McConaughey plays the boss and his sleazy rather unattractive manner suits the character but that doesn't make him very likeable.

English actor Alex Pettyfer plays the drifter.

Even with its occasional nudity I didn't really take to 'Magic Mike' and I found myself nodding off at times.

Best suited for those who want to see male arses and intentionally cheesy dance routines.

☆☆

Bridge

Wednesday night, 43.30%, 16/17 Rubbish

Cosmopolis

In 'Cosmopolis' a youthful multi millionaire, Robert Pattinson, spends the day in a stretch limousine being driven slowly across town in search of a haircut. He engages in the sort of stuff any millionaire might whilst in that limousine from having sex to being anally probed for a prostate check by his GP to urinating into a concealable stainless steel pan.

The film's purpose is to be a commentary on Western capitalism, a legitimate topic for film.

If your taste in dialogue extends to lines like

'my prostate is asymmetrical' or

'the fungus living between my toes speaks to me'

then this may be a film for you.

I found it pretentious and supremely boring.

☆

Ranger George

Council Ranger George has deduced, reasonably, that a car near my home which is minus its number plates, is stacked with boxes inside, is in a decaying condition and has not moved from its parked spot in weeks is abandoned.

But Ranger George himself might require impounding. The three days grace he gave the owner to remove 'the article' passed by three weeks ago.

Bridge

Last night, 50.90%, 5/11, surprising considering we had four complete bottom boards and only one top.

At the house

It was a sunny cloudless winter's day on Saturday when I was at the Sydney Opera House. The precinct was packed with drinkers, diners and visitors at the conclusion of the opera around 4.15pm.

First intermission in the bar overlooking the harbour

A packed Opera Bar below, crowds on the concourse above

Lucky country

I am occasionally reminded that despite our many complaints we in Australia live in a lucky country. As distant as we are from many of the world's hot spots we don't escape entirely the high security measures so prevalent in these days of terrorism fears. But there are exceptions.

Yesterday I attended the matinee performance of Australian Opera's production of 'Aida'. Also in the audience was the popular New South Wales' Governor, Professor Marie Bashir. She appeared to be accompanied by two family members but there was not a security officer nor a uniformed and braided Aide de Camp in sight.

The rows in the Sydney Opera House are fifty or so seats wide and Professor Bashir's seat was bang in the middle of one of them. Just like any other patron, Professor Bashir made her way past dozens of other audience members at every production break cheerfully acknowledging each as she passed by.

I liked that we weren't made to engage in a vice regal rendition of 'God Save The Queen' as happened once when I attended a staging of Swan Lake in the presence of a previous Governor-General.

Aida

(Australian Opera)

Giuseppe Verdi's 'Aida'. Amneris, Pharoah's daughter, is in love with Radames, an Egyptian army captain, himself secretly in love with Amneris' handmaiden, Aida, an Ethiopian slave. This menage a trois is unlikely to end well especially as Egypt and Ethiopia are about to go to war with each other. For that matter, Italian Grand Opera rarely ends well for its main characters.

In a sense this production didn't begin well for me. The Director is Graeme Murphy and his interpretation had my imagination running at a tangent from the start. At the opening five Egyptian Gods - human bodies with bird-like heads - glide across the stage on a moving pathway. Their posture and hand movements no doubt are intended to echo ancient hieroglyphics but my first thought was of signalling traffic police. Radames enters the stage guided by the 'traffic police' and is greeted by a huge slightly curved sword descending from on high and hovering just out of his reach. The gentle yet firm upward curve of the sword made me think immediately of a giant erect penis. Don't worry, its me not you.

Every time that damn erect object returned I had the same thought. Later the penis...I mean, sword...hovers near the pyramid as though waiting to be fellated. Then in the triumphal march scene Radames eventually appears with his erect penis...er, sword...in hand.

Enough of my demented thoughts, though, as this is a fine presentation of the opera. Radames is sung by Rosario La Spina and his Aida by Latonia Moore. I don't have Marcellous' knowledge of musicianship or voice but in my opinion La Spina and Moore perform admirably. They are well matched with their strong classically Italian sounding voices. They are also a match physically which is a bit of a pity because to maintain the illusion of romantic lovers they are best viewed through closed eyes. The sound, though, is superb. Amneris is sung by Milijana Nikolic whose deeper (mezzo soprano?) voice is less appealing to me but that is just a personal preference.

Murphy's production edges near 1940s MGM musical overkill at times but also has its moments of restraint perhaps best exemplified in the opening scene of Act 3 which is mostly low key and beautiful, that is, once the topless female dancer swimming in the front-of-stage pool has departed the scene.

I have penalised the production one star for the traffic police and giant penis.

☆☆☆☆

Tower

I went into Sydney's Central Business District early yesterday morning to sign papers for my property purchase. It was pretty cold by Sydney's standards, just 7°c which is about as cool as it gets in the coastal section of the city.

As usual I was a bit early and took time to explore Angel Place which was completely in shadow and looking back through the darkened lane I had wandered down I caught sight of the AWA Tower in the wintery sunlight. The tower once was amongst the city's tallest structures but now is a charming curiosity.

The AWA Tower yesterday morning;

Bridge

Last night, 45.50%, 11/16, tricky hands.

I did but see him diving by.......

My good blogger friend Andrew observed that the male gymnastics and men's diving obviously had not yet commenced at the London Olympics or I would be aware that this sporting extravaganza was underway. As an aside, am I allowed to actually print the words London Olympics or am I in danger of persecution by the IOC police for unauthorised use of their 'intellectual' - commercial(?) - property?

Well, I am aware of that event. Who could not be with the welter of coverage it is receiving in the media?

On my return home from work this afternoon I decided I would take some time to view the coverage. After all, my cable television service has quite thoughtfully added eight - count them, eight - additional sports channels and those eight channels are televising nothing but the Olympic Games non stop, 24 hours per day, for the entirety of the Games.

Now, Andrew may not believe this but what should be on display on the very first channel I tuned to but Men's Synchronised Diving. Truly, I had no idea it was being screened at that moment. In fact I had no idea there was such a sport as Synchronised Diving. Let's set aside whether any activity involving synchronisation can be called a sport as distinct from an entertainment and I have to admit the images were immediately pleasing to my eye.

There they stand, young and fit male divers two by two, adjusting themselves whilst on that high platform with the unblinking television camera bringing it all to me and full frontal no less in my own lounge room. The dives themselves are quite thrilling, dangerous looking and best of all over in seconds when the pairs then pull themselves from the pool with speedos clinging to their...ahem...bodies.

As if this feast for the eyes were not sufficient most of the pairs then adjourn to a wonderfully clear watered spa where they frolic with other pairs of divers. Who dreamt up this 'sport'; George Michael?

I loved it and was hooked right through to the final medal deciding round. The Chinese pair won it. Apparently the Chinese have won everything. The audience poolside was disappointed that the British pair failed to secure a medal. One of the British divers was the popular Tom Daley. Curiously Daley seemed alone in shunning the communal spa following each dive choosing instead to shower in full gaze of the television camera. I didn't mind at all.

Tom Daley is rather attractive actually and here he is during one of his numerous showers.

(www.london2012.com)

And here he is with his synchronised partner, the rather aptly named, Peter Waterfield.

(www.london2012.com)

Now that event has been decided, I wonder which channel is screening the male gymnasts?

Bridge

Last night, 43.30% 11/13, a bit like Australia's performance so far at a certain sports carnival.

Bridge

Last night, 57.40% 3/12. Better, can we sustain it?

Handy Andy

Andy

Yes, I have been watching a certain cooking competition and tonight the last three remaining competitors cook off in the finale.

The gorgeous looking Andy didn't seem to be a serious challenge in the early weeks but he has come storming home. Mmmmm, he is a tasty dish all of his own. It's a pity we don't get a vote as Andy already has mine.

The Removalist

(La Boite Theatre)

Hopefully I won't end up looking like the guy in this promo for David Williamson's play.

I've just spent an hour or so with a removalist who is quoting on my forthcoming change of apartments. I dislike moving. All that packing and unpacking, all that rearranging of dust, all that angst on what to keep or discard. Yes, all of it is too, too daunting for me.

This is my first move for 22 years and at the age of 63 I have a confession. This is the first time when a change of residence is my responsibility and mine alone.

For my first 24 years I lived with my parents and all my moves were initiated and organised by them. I just went along for the ride. From 24 to 38 all my moves, including four overseas countries, were employment related and taxpayer funded. The Government made the arrangements and I followed orders. Then at 41, my most recent move and for the first time I had to pay the bills. My parents were still around and active and they made all the arrangements whilst I enjoyed the fruits of their labours and organisation without breaking into a sweat.

My parents are no longer around and now I have to organise a move for the very first time. Like a real grown up. What a responsibility. A fellow volunteer at the hospital recommended a removalist to me and later when I saw the same firm's advertisement in a community newspaper I took that as a good omen.

A very bubbly and evidently efficient young woman spent an hour this morning with clipboard in hand taking notes and acquainting herself with my 'property'. I liked her. I liked that she didn't complain about walking up my steep driveway in the steady rain. "It's only rain", she commented cheerfully. I was impressed by her. Her firm provides a full range of services that I had expected previously I would need to coordinate with three or four service providers. She gave me confidence. I've already decided to accept her quote no matter what it is. Well, maybe I will need to rethink if her quote is, say, a million dollars but it won't be that outrageous surely?

Eat your heart out, David Williamson.

Bridge

Tonight. 41.90% 11/12. Poor bidding.

The Dark Knight Rises

It was a bit eerie seeing 'The Dark Knight Rises' within hours of dreadful events at a screening in Denver, Colorado. Thankfully nothing of that kind occurred here.

The Batman narratives pit good against evil and that is the unsurprising theme in this film. Evil heavily outnumbers good with villains, real, imagined and camouflaged at every turn. Principal amongst them is an almost unrecognisable Tom Hardy trussed up like Hannibal Lectar and possessing a prostethic Darth Vader voice. Anne Hathaway reinvents the Cat Woman and confirms her versatility in all manner of genres. Amongst a host of sub villains is Australia's Ben Mendelsohn chewing up the scenery in the first half.

At two and three quarter hours 'The Dark Knight Rises' is overlong in my opinion. Much of the language is quasi philosophical, quasi religious which I found irritatingly pompous and worse it muddied the specifics of many scenes. It dawned on me during the film that the plot is a take on Charles Dicken's 'A Tale of Two Cities' and indeed the book's famous line

"It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known."


is spoken near the end of the film.

The previous Batman films have presented a Gotham City that is generically urban and dangerous but nondescript. This film makes no secret that Gotham City is modelled on New York City so the later scenes of dusty streets with law enforcement reclaiming control from terrorists is unmistakably symbolic of the post 9/11 events.

Technically impressive but 'less' of almost everything would have been 'more' for me.

✩✩

Bridge

Tonight 50.20% 9/14 Still uneven.

Bridge

Last night 46.30% 9/11 Poor defence.

Not Suitable For Children

A young man discovers he has testicular cancer and decides he must father a child quickly before he is left infertile by his impending operation. Not an obvious subject for a romantic comedy but it works mainly because the two principal performers, Ryan Kwanten and Sarah Snook, make an appealing pair.

'Not Suitable For Children' was filmed around the inner suburbs of Sydney and the graffiti daubed streets make for a different view of the city with not a single stereotypical shot of the Bridge, the Opera House or the Harbour to be seen.

✩✩✩

Sydney in sunshine

I took a visiting friend from Brisbane to Sydney's North Head (the northern entrance to Sydney Harbour from the Pacific Ocean) last Sunday to show him the spectacular view.

Looking down the harbour with Sydney's CBD in the distance

Zooming in on the same view

Ferries crossing, the left ferry to Sydney, the right ferry to Manly

Bridge

Last night 53.00% 5/13 Better but uneven.

Going, going, gone

I am financing the purchase of my new apartment by selling my current apartment and my late mother's apartment. Both were placed on the market two weeks ago for sale by auction scheduled for 24 July.

In the meantime interest in terms of viewing numbers has been encouraging and competitive offers ahead of auction have been received.

To my relief both apartments have sold ahead of auction. Contracts for my mother's apartment were exchanged last evening, the purchaser being my mother's next door neighbour. Contracts for my apartment were exchanged barely minutes ago and less than five hours after the purchaser made her first enquiry and viewing. Don't some people move quickly!

Now for the task of clearing both apartments and establishing myself in the new apartment.

Bridge

Bridge tonight 42.20% 13/14 Legless.

'Old Man'

(Belvoir Street Theatre)

'Old Man' is a new Australian play just 70 minutes in length. A mid thirties husband and father finds himself alone at home one morning with all indications that his wife and two children have left him and with no clue as to why or where they have gone. Later we see the wife and the children and it appears from their perspective that it is the husband and father who has disappeared. Still later the husband goes to meet his elderly father (the 'old man') from whom he has been estranged since the age of three.

The early mystery of who has disappeared from whom and why is never explained but in hindsight I sense those scenes represent the fears those characters have of the husband repeating the behaviour of his 'old man'.

It is an interesting play, very nicely acted by the cast of six.

Recommended. ✩✩✩✩

Exhibition standard

The vey nice couple from whom I have purchased my next apartment have kindly offered access for my friends to view the establishment ahead of settlement should I wish. All they ask, quite reasonably, is some notice so that the place is at 'exhibition standard'.

I know how they feel. My current apartment would rarely meet the 'exhibition standard' test and then there is the thought of an unannounced viewing interrupting some delicate activity. The latter thought occurred to me in the dark of this morning as I was myself engaged in an enjoyably delicate activity. Perhaps I should terminate that line of thought here.

Returning to 'exhibition standard' I am learning quickly that one element of that standard, for the estate agents, is clutter, or more to the point the lack of it. The two earnest, yet attractive, young men marshalling me through the rough waters of selling property are very keen on the 'uncluttered look'.

Now, I am a gay man but a man nonetheless. That means I have a tendency to leave things where they drop. Literally. By no manner does that mean in the 'stowed' position as air stewards might say. I suppose that constitutes clutter. On the other hand my apartment, even after 22 years of habitation, would be universally described by my friends as minimalist in decoration. After all, I still have four totally bare walls in my bedroom. There are prints and other knick knacks decorating the other rooms but my bedroom remains resolutely for sleeping and...well...delicate activity...not for art appreciation.

I have found it difficult to 'declutter' my apartment to the estate agents' standards. There has been much stowing of material into cupboards, a useless exercise to my mind, given the clear evidence following each viewing that some viewers have inspected the insides of said hiding receptacles.

Without revealing too much, here is a photograph of part of my kitchen prepared by me to 'exhibition standard'. I would call the style, 'desert bare', but in the minds of the estate agents I have left them a rain forrest for clearance.

'Clutter' be gone!

Anyway I do try but the two agents looks of reproach towards me as though they are dealing with a schoolboy possessed of two left feet trying to emulate Fred Astaire are unmistakeable.

Bridge

Tonight 46.00% 12/14 Hammered.

A Royal Affair

(In Danish with English sub-titles)

In the late eighteenth century an English Princess marries the King of Denmark only to find herself in a largely loveless arranged marriage. In time she enters into an affair with the King's physician. This odd threesome introduces reforms to a country which then had been a backwater in Europe.

'A Royal Affair' is based on historical fact and for that reason maintained my interest. It is well acted and nicely photographed but a trifle overlong.

✩✩✩