The highs and lows of parents with dementia.
Yesterday I visited Mum at the nursing home which is a regular Saturday morning activity.
Her smile as I approached indicated this was a day when she would recognise who I am even if it has been fifteen months since she last called me by my name. Within moments of joining her I noticed, by the smell unfortunately, that Mum had soiled herself. I called a carer over who took Mum back to her room to tidy her up and dress her in fresh clothing.
I remained in the general lounge reading whilst I awaited Mum's return. When Mum walked back down the corridor a short time later and sighted me as if for the first time that day she immediately broke into spirited humming of Somewhere Over The Rainbow.
My mother may not always recognise me but even in the fog of her dementia that is a mother who knows her son!
I imagine these are moments that keep you going Victor.
ReplyDeleteSad, but true - and I think it happens to everyone, I remember when my gran started talking to me as if I wasn't there - she hadn't recognised me, was asking about someone 20 years younger. In between all this, she was telling me of her day - where she went, who she visited etc. All from 80 years ago - unfinished business , perhaps, that had to be done before she could go.
ReplyDeleteIts the moment of final transition to our own adulthood - our parents become dependent children, and we cant go home anymore. We are alone. Take heart Victor - your not on your own, its part of life that we must go through to grow ourselves.
Michael.
You are a fine, fine son for visiting her regularly, even when it appears she doesn't recognize you.
ReplyDeleteDitto what Mark in DE said. In her own way she doesn seem to remember you.
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